i love him so much, he is the best thing to have ever happened to me. My feelings grow to the point of obsession and never cease. Each day that passes where we are not together it feels like my heart collapses. Whatever I've done in a past life must've been horrible to face being away from you every day. I wish the warmth of my tears were replaced by the warmth of your warm hand caressing me instead.

Our anniversary is coming up in a few days, but we will not be together to celebrate it. I don't know if I should find it funny or sad that were only a quarter of a day away by car yet still can't see eachother or move in together. Only 8 hours it would take. I know it's futile to feel this way since there isn't anything I can do, having no money. A part of me, a big part, just wants to leave and stay with him. To forget everything and to go to him and start something new together. It's unrealistic, especially considering I have a pretty good life where I'm at. Even if my life was "perfect" though I would still rather be with him. Even if we had nothing but the clothes on our backs I would choose to be with him. I know I just have to wait though, then we will be together. I have to wait, and save money, and go to school. It really sucks, but it's worth it for him. Anything would be.

Sometimes when I wash my hands I let the warm water run over them a few seconds longer and pretend the warmth is coming from your hands instead.